C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize
