hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Randomize
