yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
