So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Randomize
