Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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