I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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