We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
You dont lie about slip and slides
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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