she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
