got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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