I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
