Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
