Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
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