My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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