there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Randomize
