wat bout pragnant strippers??
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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