The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
