Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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