He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
