He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I want to fling myself into the sun
Randomize
