Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
