Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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