Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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