I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize
