I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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