happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
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