you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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