she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
