Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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