the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
