so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Randomize
