my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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