I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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