my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize