he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Randomize
