This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize