im holly from the hills drunk
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
