You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
