I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
