what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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