3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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