i don't want you to think of me as your TA
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
