If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Randomize
