chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
