My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
