I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
