Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
