talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
This house was built for laser tag.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
