I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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