When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
You left your phone here
Wait...
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
