I need help removing her.
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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